Life Begins When You Are Old


Nothing can stop it.

Nobody can press pause.

No kings. No Queens.

No presidents.

Nobody has been able to stop AGING.

Nobody has been able to stop us from growing old.

No matter how much we want to stay young, it ain’t happening.

Someone yesterday told me…

You don’t know how it is to not be seen.

You don’t know how age can make you invisible.

I could never say that I do know how it is to be 20 years older, but what I can say is, that I have met young people who feel old, and I’ve met older people who feel like they’re on top of the world.

So what makes a person age without aging?

How is it possible for someone not to feel the loss of youth?

Is it possible at all?

I dare say that it is.

I dare say that we get to choose how we see ourselves.

I dare say that if you feel like you are too old to be successful, too old to be in love, too old to go on an adventure,

Then you are too old.

And people will see you this way as well.

I have to tell you when my husband died I was 34 years old, and I felt so old.

Crazy. Crazy. Crazy.

I could not see my life force.

I could not see how young I was.

I could not see I had my whole life ahead of me.

Why was I so blind?

Because the world around me was telling me that youth takes place in our 20s.

Because the world has been putting pictures of young adults on TV, on commercials, in magazines and they get to reflect many life experiences to us.

They get to show us how life looks like.

So when we stop looking 25, we start to feel old.

How do we even attempt to change that?

My goodness where do I begin?

Well, I will just start by saying your age does not define your life.

It is manufactured so it can define your expectations, your possibilites.

It is used by the world around you to put you in a box.

Don’t let them.

Don’t let them tell you how to be at what age.

Don’t let them scare you away from life.

Age is a counting formula, one we have created so we understand time. That’s all it is.

Don’t make it more significant. Don’t let your age, age you before its time.

To be honest with you, I agree with the saying: the youth is wasted on the young.

I could not do much with my youth as I didn’t have my age to give me advice.

Life does begin much later than we imagine. (Click to Tweet!)

Whoever told you it begins when you turn 18 was lying.

My life began when I turned 39. Not even a day before.

And there is a very good chance that it will begin again in my mid 50s.

And maybe once again in my 70s. I am planning on all my beginnings. I hope you are too.

When did your life begin?

All my love,

Christina

Comments

  1. Some days it feels like all I do is new beginnings (multiple back surgeries, cancer, etc). The list doesn’t matter. It’s that you move again, even if it’s on you’re hands knees for awhile. Last year I somewhat learned to kayak, this winter I’m cross country skiing. learning something new keeps the wind under my wings, lifting me back into a standing position emotionally, and sometimes physically.

  2. I never thought about numbers or hid my age from anyone. Until a number of very close friends started using botox on their foreheads and getting collagen injections elsewhere on their face, wearing heavier makeup. I’ve caried on being completely comfortable with aging but also ‘feeling’ the passing of time much more than before. I couldn’t believe it when my own mother suggested I botox my frownline at the age of 39. And that was a decade ago! Wish peoole wouldn’t reflect their insecurities on others like this.

  3. My life began at age 47 when I got sober. And at age 52 when my 23 year marriage ended. And at 54 when I asked my beloved to marry me. Difficult losses, such as the death of both parents (dad in 2011 and mom in 2014) were a large part of finding these new beginnings. Somehow when someone you love passes away, smaller things, trivial things, get stripped away, and the truly meaningful essence of what’s important remains. That for me is unconditional love, family, affirmation, support, trust, faith, grace and truth. Age is just a number. I am a completely new person!

  4. I think we start new chapters in our lives. Not always new beginnings, as we always carry a part of ourselves with us throughout our entire lives into new situations. I would not say I started my life after my husband passed as I treasure all those years with him and my kids. To say I started life after that is negatively reflecting on my life with them. there were many joyous years. All my 64 years are precious to me!
    New Chapters in my book of life are ever evolving. A part of me as who I was as a child is still with me , deep within my soul! Yes , we change and grow, but I don’t think we ever start all over. Maybe continue life on a different path.

  5. My husband died when I had just turned 39. I felt sooo old! What I was feeling was loss, stress, dipression, tired. The list goes on. All of these struggles and discovery was hard work and stressful. As I learned how to manage my life as a “double parent” and did my homework as to how to make sense of my loss, I slowly began to find myself again. It was not the same person before my loss, but it was still me. I was now a person of much more depth, empathy, a person who looks at life with more understanding. I appreciate life and the people I choose to share my life with. Learning to cut out unimportant things, like weather my daughter’s socks match or being upset because someone cut me off while I was driving. As I travel through my journey of grieve I have learned to be kind to myself and give myself breaks. I have learned to laugh again, to live again and this is what has made me feel younger than when my husband had died. Living my new life well below the surface of a superficial society has given me an internal love for myself and therefore allowed me to extend my love to others. This is the internal youth, to love, even after such deep loss. Happy travels!

  6. When did my life begin? I feel like it began in 2008, and got stuck again in 2011…. and I’m waiting for it to be able to begin AGAIN!

  7. This had been a topic of conversation with 4 different people the last few days. I am 47 and for my first 20ish years I thought nothing of the future, figured that meant I was going to die young. And now 7 years my husband’s death and 3 years after my son’s I have decided that I want to live. And not just exist. Really live. If I died tomorrow I’m ok with it, as in I don’t fear it, but when I was told yesterday that my life span was maybe another 25 years I called bullshit (sorry, but that was the effect it had on me!) on that! Who says? I want to live as if this might be my last day but deep down believing that I still get to LIVE another 47 years! It’s like I just got called into the game, and while I’m not sure even what the game is, I wanna play!

  8. I think it’s the traumas we suffer in life that make us feel old. They take so much out of you, at least that’s been the case for me. I love this article because it gives us hope that we can feel “younger” again, at least in spirit. And that’s where it counts the most.

  9. Great message here. I always say I would not want to be 20 again for anything. They have no class, no wisdom, no life experience. We all had to go through our 20’s to get where we are now, but I’m glad that’s behind me. I need to save this writing for frequent reference. Thanks!

  10. I’m trying to begin a new chapter in my life. I lost my husband six years ago when my boys were only six and nine years old. It has been quite the journey and I’ve had to navigate things that I never thought I’d have to, like getting a home loan modification from a major bank. That took two years of arduous paperwork that routinely vanished into cyberspace, but my tenacity paid off. Now my boys are twelve and fifteen and the passing of time makes me anxious. I recently completed a graduate certification from UCLA in patient advocacy and I’m scared to death of moving on. I love my job but I need a better one, one that could be the beginning I’m so desperately hoping for. I’m 52 now and I wonder if life can begin again for me. Will I find love in my new beginning ? I’m being pushed out of my nest, I hope I can fly ! Thanks for the inspiration to try !

  11. Thank you for allowing all of us to gain from your loss. You are an authentic soul, wise beyond your years. You encourage me to actually live and learn through my pain, not avoid it. May you be blessed & know His peace and abound in His presence,

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Christina Rasmussen

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