What if they can hear you?

What if you can talk to your child. Your husband. Your wife. Your father. Your mother. Your friend, even after their passing. What if that’s what we are supposed to do. What if they want us to do that. What if they can hear us. What if they can talk to us? But not unless we are willing to believe that it is possible. You see they want us to talk to them. Visit with them. Our world is…

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One Day You Will Be Asked To Fly

I was taken aback. Stopped in my tracks. I was about to climb again just like I normally do every day. And that’s when I saw it. The summit. The top of my mountain. I froze. I sat there. There was no hill to climb. Just sky. I didn’t know what to do with the sky. What was I to do? When I crawled in 2006, it took me a long time to get up. When I got up it took me a long time to walk.…

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Losing My Dog Tyson

He was with me every second of the day. He was my shadow for exactly 8 years. He followed me around everywhere. Even when I would go to the bathroom he would just wait outside the door. He would place himself at the center of the living room to see which way I would be heading to next. And he would just look me in the eyes, trying to guess what I would do. Of course I was his second love,…

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It comes in like a lullaby. Quiet at first but so melodical that you recognize it. It calms you down and it gets you through another day. It almost feels like it is coming from really far away, from a different place. Outside of earth. I am talking about Hope. The most precious feeling especially for those of us who have been struck by loss. For every person who feels the burden of grief.……

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Goodbye Survivor, I Have Work To Do

I first met her after my husband was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer. Her first words were... you should have been the one dying. It would have been easier. Then she went on to tell me that I would not be able to raise my kids without him, that he was the smart one. He was the strong one. He was the one with a job. He was the one who could do it all. It should have been me with the…

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Loving Again After Loss

Someone asked me the other day on Facebook about my husband, the man I married after my loss. She wasn’t the first one to ask. Many people over the years have asked about him. I mention him in the Second Firsts book a little bit. But over the course of the 8 years I have been writing to you, I hardly ever talk about him. I met him during my second year post loss at the local children’s…

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3 Comments7 Minutes

One Single Thought

I have so many things to tell you today. I wish I could just drop in at your home. Have coffee and chat. Tell you that you will be ok. Tell you that life is hard but it is also very good. Tell you that we will lose so much but with every loss we will find our way again to a new beginning. To a new understanding of what it means to be alive. And what does it mean to be alive? It means to…

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Who Am I Now?

When I dropped off my daughter to college last week, it was as if my whole world was demolishing. All the buildings that made my life, were falling apart. I could even hear the buildings falling. The rubble. When your life is changing there is an audio of the universe moving things around. The maneuvering stops time. Or it feels like it does because our lives are about to take a turn. My…

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The Room Walker

You are one tiny thought away from a completely different life. (Click Here to Tweet!) But we live inside a room with no windows. A room that keeps us thinking this is the only room. There are Infinite rooms. I didn’t really understand this fully until the last couple of years. You see, all of us are capable of occupying many rooms. Some of us can live in many different ones at the same…

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Do Whatever it Takes to Get Through This

“Do whatever you have to, to get through the pain after I am gone.” my husband said to me a few months before he died. “Whatever it takes.” he said. “It doesn’t matter what it is you have to do, if it makes you feel better then do it.” I didn’t always follow his advice but it did help me feel less guilt when my choices after loss were not perfect. When we lose someone we love, it hurts like…

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4 Comments3 Minutes