I had been sitting inside this small cubicle for a while by then.
I remember that day being just like all the others before it.
But that cold winter morning there was an additional thought inside my mind.
I should have missed it.
It lasted for a second.
It was quiet.
But I caught it. It said:
“I can’t believe you are still in this cubicle, doing work you don’t like.
I looked up and stopped working.
I pulled my chair back and just rested there for a while.
I hadn’t had that thought in so long.
I was surviving my day to day after loss existence and in that survival I had no time to think thriving thoughts.
I knew that this bold thriving thought was probably one of the very last ones.
She was becoming a ghost even as I was sitting there.
Was I really meant for something greater?
Now if you don’t mind, I am going to take you to a different vantage point.
We will fly above my cubicle and look at the crossroad that was being formed as soon as I paid attention to my one thriving thought.
Path One (Survivor Thought):
Christina, look at you climbing the corporate ladder as a single mom. By year 2018 (that was year 2009) when your oldest daughter will graduate high school you will be in a great position to support her financially in college.
Path Two (Thriver Thought): You know that idea you had about building a community of people starting over, maybe there is something there.
As we are hovering above my cubicle I want to share with you that Path One felt safe and I could see far ahead. I had planned the next ten years, financially and professionally.
Path Two was very scary but my thriving thought had escaped my fear center and my survivor self one last time and it tried to remind me I still had a bold option.
That day… I still chose path one.
I got up the next morning and stepped into that same routine.
The routine of my survivor self.
The routine of fear.
You see Path one was difficult but not as difficult as Path two.
But what you can’t see from where you are, is what I did do with that bold thriving thought from that day forward.
I took it with me in the car on the drive to work.
And I would think about it.
Over and over again.
I would say I had about 150 drives with that one bold thriving thought sitting right next to me. And one night this one bold thought took me by surprise, it had gained power and it made me take a real action. I can tell you what that first action was… but it is not important.
What is important here is that I did not let go of my bold thriving thought.
I took it with me in my routine, in my drive to work until it got stronger and it resulted in a real action.
So today, I am going to ask you to catch that one bold thought that is becoming inside your mind and hold on to it while you are living path one.
Don’t let it go.
Keep talking to it.
Dream with it.
And one day it too will surprise you by leaping into reality and taking that first action towards your destiny.
With boldness, and lots of thriving thoughts,